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The
story is told about a small, country church where the pastor called a
special meeting of the congregation to approve the purchase of a brand
new chandelier. After some discussion pro and con, an old farmer stood
up and said, "Buying a new chandelier may seem like a good idea to you,
but I’m against it for three reasons. First of all, it’s too expensive
and we can’t afford one. Second, there isn’t anybody around here who
knows how to play one. And third, what we really need in this church is a
new light fixture."
How
often have you not been as close to 100% right as you thought you
were...and then based on some faulty knowledge...taken a road best not
traeled.
The next time you are in the middle of a heated conflict...having failed to control yourself...
Honestly express your differences while suppressing your emotions. And restrain yourself from any colorful language. In short, not only don't start the flame...don't fan it.
Focus on the problem, not the person.
Search for a solution rather than someone to blame.
Don't get a superior tone in your voice.
If you are at least part of the problem, admit it.
When problems arise, don't walk out on the problem work them out.
If you are at least part of the problem, admit it.
When problems arise, don't walk out on the problem work them out.
Listen more than you talk. The more we talk the more all of us are inclined to stick our feet in our mouth.
Discuss a problem in a spirit of forgiveness...don't stubbornly demand guarantees.
In
Genesis 13:8 Abram says to Lot, "Please let there be no strife between
you and me, and between my herdsmen and your herdsmen; for we are
brethren."
And I say to you in a 21st century version, "(Christian church people...if
there is strife between you and any other member or members (in your
church), let there be no strife between you, for your are brothers and
sisters in Christ...you are indeed...brethren."
Just
remember... "Coping with difficult people is always a problem.
Especially if the difficult person happens to be yourself." (John
Maxwell)
May I ask you a question? How
many people get up every morning and make out a list of what they are
going to do to hurt you, how many ways they are going to find to
disagree with you...
I
hope there are none...few of us have more than one hard core antagonist
lurking behind every bush...fact is...most of us have no hard core
antagonist who are out to get us on a regular basis.
Most
conflict arises because someone is out of sorts...and we were at the
wrong place at the wrong time with the wrong idea emanating from our
lips.
So cool it...wait it out...most conflicts will die a natural death if we give them half a chance...
It's called Neutral conflict: that which is generated by differences in perspective and
personality.
But if obviously you have a serious difference...learn to live with it...WITH PATIENCE AND CHRISTIAN CHARITY.
People see things differently.
Show respect...differing conclusions don't have to produce angry rebellion...at least they certainly shouldn't
John
Wesley was specifically instrumental in forming the Wesleyan or
Methodist church. Another great reformer of his day, George Whitfield
worked with him in the early days, but their differing doctrinal
differences caused a rift in their cooperative working.
Whitfield and Wesley parted company to work separately. They preferred integrity and dignity to conflict.
Then one day, Whitfield was approached by somebody who expected him to criticize Wesley. "Do you think you will see John Wesley in heaven?" Whitfield was asked.
"Oh no", came Whitfield's reply, "Wesley will be so close to the throne of God I won't be able to see him."1
Could you...would you say that about someone with whom you recently passionately disagreed.
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A QUOTE FROM THOUGHTS POSTED ON WYRICK'S WRITING ENTITLED "How To Deal with Conflicts"
A rather crude and cruel experiment was carried out by Emperor Frederick, who ruled the Roman Empire in the thirteenth century.
He
wanted to know what man’s original language was: Hebrew, Greek, or
Latin? He decided to isolate a few infants from the sound of the human
voice.
He reasoned that they would eventually speak the natural tongue of man.
Wet nurses who were sworn to absolute silence were obtained, and though it was difficult for them, they abided by the rule.
The infants never heard a word -- not a sound from a human voice. Within several months they were all dead.
POSTED ON WYRICK'S WRITING THOUGHTS ENTITLED "Are You a Peacemaker or Peacebreaker?" (Continuation of Series)
Proverbs 14:17 gives a pretty good reason to be a Peacemaker rather than Peacebreaker … "A quick-tempered man does foolish things." And who wants to be called an angry fool?
With such careless ease we say, “I lost my temper.” But have you ever stopped to think of the implications behind that phrase. Lose
it often enough and the results can be disastrous; for that is the way
people lose their spouses and jobs and health and opportunities
and...the list is long.
POSTED ON WYRICK'S WRITING THOUGHTS ENTITLED "Arrogance and Humility' (Series Continued)
If you were asked, "What is the most important discovery or accomplishment in your life? " how would you answer the question?
POSTED ON WYRICK'S WRITING THOUGHTS ENTITLED "What Do You Want from Jesus?"
Do you want from Jesus all the joy that can be gained from fully accepting the fact that you are truly the child of a King? So that when you die you will not have to ask that someone write on your tombstone, “Born a human being, died a question mark.”
POSTED ON WYRICK'S WRITING THOUGHTS ENTITLED "Are you a Peacemaker or a Peacebreaker?"
Someone has said that peace is merely that brief, glorious, moment in history when everyone stops to reload their weapons.
POSTED ON WYRICK'S WRITING THOUGHTS ENTITLED ""Arrogance and Humility
When a company takes over another company, there is often a sign placed outside the premises announcing, UNDER NEW MANAGEMENT.
Such a sign accurately summarizes what takes place in Christian conversions. When Christ takes over a life, that life is literally under new management.
So consider, is God now managing your pride? Or is your pride still managing you?
click on the following
TO TAKE YOU TO THE WYRICK'S WRITING'S SITE
Yes, God loves you the way you are but he loves you too much to let you stay that way.
+++++++++++++++++++++++
Click
on the URL below to WATCH NEIL IN HIS WORLD FAMOUS ONE MAN
DRAMATIZATIONS OF ABRAHAM LINCOLN, BEN FRANKLIN, CHARLES WESLEY AND
MARTIN LUTHER
To Order and Read Neil's 9th book THE SPIRITUAL ABRAHAM LINCOLN
GO TO amazon.com
QUOTES ABOUT THIS WONDERFUL INSPIRING INFORMATIVE book
STILL RECEIVING RAVE REVIEWSYEARS AFTER IT'S PUBLICATION.
"Positive,
powerful utterances...skillfully enhancing our understanding and
appreciation of Lincoln while revealing the Divine source of his
strength."
Lt. Colonel C.A. Olsen (Ret.) Asbury College (Professor Ret.)
"The Spiritual Abraham Lincoln is an
extremely well written book that investigates what might be termed the
spiritual side of President Lincoln. It's both scholarly and very
readable. I came away impressed at Mr. Wyrick's portrayal of the
President and with an altered and enlarged vision of the man:'
William Hoffman, Award winning fiction writer; author of Blood and Guile, and Wild Thorn
"Wyrick
has authored a wonderful examination of the spirituality of one of
American history's most devoutly religious leaders...a pleasant and
readable book that has a rich depth of information."
Maynard Pittendreigh Presbyterian minister
"When
it comes to invoking religion in support of any of their decisions,
politicians need to sit at the feet of Abraham Lincoln. Reinhold Niebuhr
once called him 'America's greatest theologian.' Why so great? Because
he invariably distinguished between human works and the works of the
Almighty. As Wyrick
says, 'He wore the mantle of humility easily: because he was more
impressed with what God was doing in the world than with what he,
president of the United States in the midst of an awful crisis, was
doing. That is why in his last major speech he distinguished between
both human causes in the Civil War and the Almighty's 'own purposes.'
Lincoln would have agreed that it is better to leave God-talk out of
politics than to decorate human proposals with divinity. This is a book
for our American time. Through his careful study of Lincoln's career,
Wyrick compels us to remember that piety belongs in politics only when piety transcends politics."
Dr. Donald W. Shriver
Emeritus professor at Union Theological Seminary in New York. Author of An Ethic for Enemies: Forgiveness in Politics
"v. Neil
Wyrick's fine work allows the reader to appreciate Abraham Lincoln's
Christian commitment and his prophetic role in American history. Should
have a wide readership."
James H. Smylie Professor of Church History (Ret.) Union Theological Seminary, Richmond, Virginia
"Neil Wyrick's The Spiritual Abraham Lincoln should be read
by anyone attempting to understand the man who was probably the most
complex person to ever hold the office of president of the United
States. Dr. Wyrick is intent on demonstrating that the spirituality so
often expressed in Lincoln's writings and speeches was not merely lip
service to a Deity, but rather expressions of a profound faith in a real
God. It was this faith that provided the wisdom, compassion, insight
and sometimes steel that Lincoln would need in full measure
as he led the United States through the Civil War. Dr. Wyrick's clear
and unpretentious style of presentation is very much in keeping with the
character ofhis subject, and in so doing, Wyrick makes his point very
well that Lincoln, his beliefs, and the faith that formed them, are as
relevant to a troubled America in 2004 as they were in 1863."
Daniel Allen Butler, author of "Unsinkable"; The Full Story of the RMS Titanic, The Lusitania and The Age o f Cunard
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