DRIVE FOLKS FROM CHURCH TEN EASY WAYS TO DRIVE PEOPLE FROM THE CHURCH

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"Are you a pillar of the church?"

"No, I'm a flying buttress—I support it from the outside."

            During twenty years in the pastorate ministry and over thirty years as an evangelist I early concluded that driving people away from church is much easier than leading them to it.  I therefore, with tongue in cheek, suggest the following as sure fire techniques for accomplishing these less than productive methods..

            NEVER ASK THEM TO COME IN THE FIRST PLACE.  This is rule number one and it is literally worth its weight in gold.  If the rule seems too severe in its initial application, procrastination may be practiced by simply stating, “I must ask them to come to church with me sometime, just not right now.”  This will salve a conscience and allow sleep to knit the raveled sleeve of care. 

IF THEY COME IGNORE THEM.  Sit by them but do not speak.  Sing by them but do not offer them a hymn book.  When the service is over, turn your back on them and engage in a lively conversation with a church member of long standing.  If they are in line waiting to meet the minister, take a particularly long time in conversing with your pastor.  They may quite probably grow weary of waiting and leave by the side door.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

IF YOU DO SPEAK, COMPLAIN.  If you are by nature a gregarious individual and must speak do not speak kindly of the church or anyone in it.  Complain of the minister’s vices and speak not at all of his virtues.  Tell of the trouble in the choir.  Be sure and mention the women’s group is a clique (unless of course, you are a member of said group) and that you wouldn’t go if they paid you.  The list of things easy to complain about in all churches is long, so just pick and choose.  You will be gratified beyond words with the results.

LEAVE BAD IMPRESSIONS.  Be unkind, rude and course, be filled with malicious gossip and be ready at a moment to share it, etc.  There is nothing quite so powerful in building up the non-church-attending forces of our land as Christians who don’t act like it.  Be sure you elicit spontaneous comment from someone each day to the effect, “If he’s a Christian, I’m not interested.” 

NEVER OR SELDOMK PRAY.  Act As if hou believe that man can achieve the church’s success by his own hands and needs no help from God.  Follow the philosophy, “Heaven for heaven, earth for earth, you know” or “I am the captain of my soul.  I am the master of my fate.” 

REFUSE TO WORK IN THE CHURCH.  Every church needs workers and if enough members refuse to participate the inefficiency of the church program is assured.  There will, of course, be certain things which cannot be done for lack of cooperation, and some other things under-manned which will not be done very well or if enough people refuse to help, not at all.  This rule will also assure a good bit of doubling-up and even double doubling-up on jobs.  This latter effect gives an excellent opportunity to complain that the church is run by a few people.

LEARN THE CLASSIC CLICHES AND SPREAD THEM FAR AND WIDE.  A few samples should stimulate any reader of these thoughts to find or invent others.

1. God doesn’t expect you to be in church every time the door opens.”
2. “You can’t love everyone; God certainly understands that…”
3. “It’s the preacher’s job to go out and get new members.  That’s what we pay him for.

There are others but these should do well for a starter.

BE NARROW MINDED.  Gasp audibly when someone new at acquiring faith asks what seems a strange questions.  Have no patience with anyone’s ideas concerning the church, it policies or programs if they do not agree with you 100%. 

GIVE LITTLE.  Excuse yourself and ease your conscience by such statements as “I have my family to think of” or “There are others who give more and some day I may give more too, just not now.”  These and any other such excuses, reasons, etc. followed to the letter by enough of any congregation can guarantee a poor program, an ill-paid preacher, a building in need of repair, a lack of necessary supplies, etc.  There is no end to the destructive results of a philosophy dedicated to holding back on giving to one’s church. 

FIND FAULT WITH THE PREACHER.  This is a drastic but it produces such excellent results that it cannot go unmentioned.  In every church there are those who love their preachers, others who are lukewarm, and others who need but a spark to spring them into a fire of righteous indignation.  A little black book or an excellent memory or even better, an overactive imagination can in a very short time produce a list of charges and complaints that corrupt and disrupt.  Since the preacher is human it may easily be remembered that once he lost his temper with Mr. Brown, that once he failed to call on Mrs. Jones, that once he…oh well, the skies the limit.  This rule will divide the congregation into units of “pro” and “con.”  It will disgust new and old Christians alike.  It will slow any plans for progress and send a spirit of unease throughout all the church. 

 

 

 

 

These rules are not original.  They are merely observations made after over fifty years in the ministry. They are a sharing from personal pastoral experience and of having talked to thousands of ministers in my evangelistic travels.   The said thing is that all of these attitudes and actions continue to be perpetuated by basically good people who give into bad moments.  Unfortunately, in some cases, these kind of attitudes and actions become life long habits.

Some recent topic titles on his other blog, Whrick’s Writings are:ONE LOG ON A FIRE, TWO JOLLY GREEN GIANTS; LOVE AND FORGIVENESS, WISDOM IS.WHAT IS HAPPY,60 PLUS AND NOT HOLDING

 

CLICK ON THE FOLLOWING URL

 

http://wyrickswritings.blogspot.com

 

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A  Quote FROM Rev. Wyrick’s 9^TH BOOK “THE SPIRITUAL ABRAHAM LINCOLN”

Everything that happened in the war was not of blood and pain and hate.  The best in man sometimes rises out of the worst.  More than likely the story of what happened

one cold day during the terrible battle of Fredricksburg reached Abe’s ears and pleased the heart of this forgiving President.  It was a dreadful battle that cried out for some miraculous act of empathy.

A Sergeant Richard Kirkland of Company E Carolina Regiment made a request of his commanding officer that was almost denied.  He had looked too long at the tortured, twisted dead and dying men and could finally stand it no more.  He sought startling permission to take water and aid to those dressed in both Blue and Gray. 

“You may get a bullet in the back of your head, son,” he was told.  The soldier replied that he wanted to go anyway.

 “May God protect you,” said Major General J. B. Kershaw.  A short time later, men on both sides of this field of agony and despair, watched in awe as the young man vaulted over a bloodstained stonewall and walked unarmed and seemingly unafraid among the dead and dying.  They saw him kneel down and cradle a fallen Union soldier in his arms, offer him a drink of water, rest his head on his knapsack and cover him with his own overcoat.  And then move to another soldier nearby.  This time it was a Confederate soldier.

Again and again throughout that long, pale December afternoon, just eleven days before Christmas, Sergeant Kirkland returned with water until every living soldier, from both the North and the South, had felt his compassion and concern.

General Kershaw later wrote that not one shot was fired during that time.  That never had he heard such silent respect.  “…no doubt,” his pen etched, “all the trumpets of heaven resounded on this monumental day.”

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********************************

To access info his other book’s and get some great used book prices, go to Amazon.com (books) and type in Neil Wyrick.

 BOUNDARIES UNLIMITED, RUST ON MY SOUL, POOR RICHARD’S ALMANAC, I AM SIXTY PLUS AND NOT HOLDING, THE ABC’S OF PARENTING AND GRANDPARENTING, LETTERS TO AMERICA…

         

V. Neil Wyrick’s ninth book THE SPIRITUAL ABRAHAM LINCOLN and is available at MAGNUS PRESS. (For some unusual books visit their Web Site)

THIS BOOK IS AVAILABLE ON AMAZON.COM’S Kindle

To visit their Web Page click on the URL below

http://www.magnuspress.com/OurProducts2.html 

 

THE QUIET SOUND OF THUNDER

There are over 600 stories and commentaries on this blog. It is added to daily.

Some recent topic titles on his other blog, Wyrick’s Writings are:ONE LOG ON A FIRE, TWO JOLLY GREEN GIANTS; LOVE AND FORGIVENESS, WISDOM IS.WHAT IS HAPPY,60 PLUS AND NOT HOLDING

CLICK ON THE FOLLOWING URL

http://wyrickswritings.blogspot.com

 Have you ever noticed that planned evangelism never was a great issue in the New Testament? 

You never read about the apostles making plans to exhort, scold, or organize evangelistic programs. 

Instead, so many of the early Christians had such a propensity for telling everyone they knew the good news of Christ’s death and resurrection that they didn’t need a plan.  Indeed, they were so eager to spread the salvation message that they got themselves into real trouble for it – like being eaten by lions in the arena or crucified upside down.

Yesl, the obvious comparison with today’s verbal lions.

            In the apostolic church, because so many were on fire for their faith, evangelism was somehow assumed – which brings me to ask these questions.  Are we on fire for our faith?  Are we at least a glowworm?  Or are just comfortably silently satisfied and therefore safe?

            Safe? 

What about Jesus?

 Jesus wasn’t safe! 

Scottish clergyman George Macleod put it this way: “Jesus was not crucified in a cathedral between two candles, but on a cross between two thieves; on the town garbage heap; at a crossroad so cosmopolitan that they had to write His title in Hebrew, Latin, and Greek.  It was the kind of place where cynics talked smut, and soldiers gambled.  That is where He died, and that is what His dying was all about.  And that is what Christians should talk about – how this Savior King died for the commonest of men…for you and me.”

           

            How should you talk about Christ?  Well, certainly don’t believe that spiritual and stuffy are soul mates. 

Don’t talk about Him in such a way that a theological library is needed to understand what you just said.

 When you talk about Christ to the man on the street, remember to keep it simple.

            Many claim they would evangelize but they don’t know how.

Think about the last movie you became enthused about.  Did you have to take a communication course, before you told someone about it? 

Does it take a doctorate in evangelism to say, “Christ is my Savior” or “I need the church, and so do you, my friend??  Or, if you really find it difficult to say those words, then offer something like “Our preacher is preaching on (whatever his announced topic is) next Sunday.  I’d like to invite you to come with me.”

            Why is it that people have no problem spreading gossip, but so much trouble spreading God? 

Well–known evangelist Charles Spurgeon put it this way:  “If you aren’t lighting any fires, maybe it is because you are not carrying any flame.  One thing is for certain, when you talk about heaven; let your face light up.  When you talk about hell, your everyday face will do.”

            Our Christian faith does not just give us noble precepts; it defines God.

When we quote Jesus words of love, describe His miracles, affirm His incarnation, we have drawn an earthly pictures of a heavenly Creator.  When we talk about death and accepting the fact of the Resurrection, we declare the greatness of His power.

            Someone once asked Dr. Charles Beard, the great historian, what lessons he had learned from history.  He responded, “First, when it gets darkest, the stars come out.  Second, when a bee steals from a flower, it also fertilizes that flower.  Third, whom the gods would destroy, they first make mad.”

            And, yes, that is the way it was. 

For, first, the Crucifixion was the darkest time in the history of mankind, but then with the miracle of the Resurrection that followed, the stars had never shone so brightly. 

Second, when God “steals” our sins by forgiveness, at that moment He fertilizes our souls. 

Third, if we give God our minds and thoughts and the avenues of our attitudes, we will see the world through His eyes.  Forget God, and we go slowly mad.

            On the gravestone of a missionary are written the following words.

            When he came, there was no light;

When he died, there was no darkness.

            When we have come into this world, lived out our days, and gone, what will we have brought too the world – light or darkness?  Be assured, it will be one or the other.

            Christ said, “Go into all the world and preached the good news”  )Mark 16:15, NIV) And He meant just that.

DO YOU HAVE A SUBJECT YOU WOULD LIKE TO HAVE NEIL WRITE ON; EXAMPLES: COURAGE, LOVE, DETERMINATION, ETC.  JUST GO TO THE BOTTOM AND CLICK ON COMMENT AND SEND US YOUR IDEA.

To view his One Man Dramas on film (see by millions, live and on film and on video)(Martin Luther, Ben Franklin, Charles Wesley, Abraham Lincoln)

CLICK ON THE FOLLOWING

 

http://www.speakerneil.com/

 

********************************

To access info his other book’s and get some great used book prices, go to Amazon.com (books) and type in Neil Wyrick.

 BOUNDARIES UNLIMITED, RUST ON MY SOUL, POOR RICHARD’S ALMANAC, I AM SIXTY PLUS AND NOT HOLDING, THE ABC’S OF PARENTING AND GRANDPARENTING, LETTERS TO AMERICA…

         

V. Neil Wyrick’s ninth book THE SPIRITUAL ABRAHAM LINCOLN and is available at MAGNUS PRESS. (For some unusual books visit their Web Site)

THIS BOOK IS AVAILABLE ON AMAZON.COM’S Kindle

To visit their Web Page click on the URL below

http://www.magnuspress.com/OurProducts2.html 

 

WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE HAPPIER AND MORE RELAXED?/THE ANXIETY OF BEING HUMAN

I have posted the piece on Anxiety on both blogs this Sunday because it has so much help to give.

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There are over 600 stories and commentaries on this blog. It is added to daily.

     As I watched him I could see the tension in his face and how he held his body and I thought of something I just read by a Dr. Julian Lake. 

 

The good doctor had set up two groups; in the first group were people who were unable to relax and in the second group were those who were relatively free from tension. 

 

They discovered that the tense people had one thing in common which was not prevalent among the relaxed group--- they were all extremely critical of others.

 

It’s really quite simple.

 

When you love your neighbor and make an effort to at least understand he or she, even if they are not acting neighborly, you feel better.

 

If you are always finding fault when your complain is a sword slicing away at your emotional stability and making it an open wound.

 

The old founding Father Benjamin Franklin put it well, “Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain and most fools do.”

 

Most quarrels exist because it takes two to tango and if they last long enough there may well be legitimate complains.

 

Actually, a great deal of criticism is born of envy.  Someone has what we don’t have and we, if not careful, have a need to put them down as a way of lifting ourselves up. 

 

Ah, my friends…

 

There is so much good

In the worst of us,

And so much bad in the best of us,

That it hardly behooves any of us,

To talk about the rest of us.

    

     There is the classic story about the boss who received a note from one of his many employees with just one word written on it, “Fool.”  He then gathered his workers together and said, “I have from time to time down through the years gotten some notes with no signature,” and then shared the note he held in hand, “but this is the first time anyone ever signed their name and forgot to write the note.”

     

       The terrible thing about being a professional in the art of finding fault with other people is that while we are seldom seeing any good in people we are seldom seeing much good in life either.  It is little wonder that criticizers lead the list of ulcer victims.

 

            And one last comment on what people are always complaining about these days; our armed forces and our government.  Have you ever run a bank? Have you ever led an Army?  When you criticize the way things are being done in America perhaps you should educate yourself in these areas before criticizing.  I know from personal experience that when I have stopped and looked more closely at some of my complaints I realized I really didn’t know what I was talking about.

60 PLUS AND NOT HOLDING (The Anxiety of Being Human)

 

GO TO NEIL’S OTHER BLOG ONE A DAY, YOUR SPIRITUAL VITAMINS and read the following brain teasers.  CLICK ON URL BELOW There are over 600 stories and commentaries on this blog. It is added to daily.

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 ANXIETY

A condition of apprehension in varying degrees, resulting from imaging the worst

" ........ Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?" Matthew 6:27 (NIV)

 THE ANXIETY OF BEING HUMAN

We will call him Tom Renick. He was sixty years old when he first came for counseling. Retired, but not a planned retirement. He looked eighty, and a weary eighty at that. "I don't know what to do," were his first words. "I no longer have a job. 1 was doing well, very well, and then in a business reoganization 1 was fired. 1 haven't been any good since. 1 was a top salesman, and now ... 1 couldn't sell a dollar bill for fifty cents."

He told me of his father dying when he was only eight, and of a loving mother who shielded him the rest of his childhood and adolescent years from all pain and hardships. "I never climbed trees, or learned to swim. 1 never played any sports," he said. "Mother was always afraid." He went on to explain that whenever problems arose, his mother was there to solve them.

 As he talked, because he was not a stupid man, he began to see how he had spent a lifetime expecting to be cared for. First by his mother, later by friends, family, then his business associates and finally by God.

While it is healthy to expect love, compassion, and concern from others,it is even more helpful if we can be standing on our own two feet when we accept them.

Was yesterday a success? Good. Be thankful! Was it a failure? Unfortunate. Learn from it! Will next week be busy, too busy, and you are worn out just thinking about it? Then don't think about it. Save your energy for doing, don't waste it by worrying.

I will not tell you I never worry. I may plan right down to the finest point and still feel concern, but I will tell you this; every ounce of worry, once I have done all I can, is a pound of foolishness.

It is not easy to turn anxieties from liabilities into assets. They have a tendency to compound themselves into nervousness and neurosis. There is a thin line between those who have conquered life or been conquered by it.

What then to do? Practical, pointed and for the sake of review.

1. Have a good physical each year. Don't fight imaginary diseases. Do fight them when they are real. The number of people who refuse to go to a doctor for fear of finding out the truth is as great as the hypochondriacs who camp on their doorsteps.

2. Take a good spiritual inventory. What you  believe. What you doubt. What you do to feed your soul. What you do to make it sick.

3.     Get a good purpose in life. Without it you spend your life heating but never cooking anything. And it lets you see beyond a momentary pain, making you able to bear a burden even if you know it is now yours for life.

 

4.     When you have done all you can in every way you know to solve a problem or a pain, don't beat your head bloody and your soul ragged continuing after the impossible.

5.     Believe that when one door is closed it does not mean all doors are closed. All of us have moments we thought were our worst, and they turned out to be our best. Problems can give us understanding. Problems can give us insights.

 

6.     See life through, whether it is good or bad. Let your mantra be, "Things may get rough sometimes, but I never quit."

7. Make many friends and forgive enemies.

 

8.     A suggestion. When concern about yourself overwhelms you, start being concerned about someone else. Your mind is not capable of worrying about two or more people at once. Therefore, if you forget yourself while caring about someone else you will automatically feel better.

 

9.     Be a person who can say, "My goal is what counts. Obstacles may slow me down, but only death will stop me. And then I am fulfilled because I did not quit." So live well, die brave.

 

Old age does not automatically bring maturity, sainthood and sweetness. The anxiety of being human is that from which no one entirely escapes.

HOW TO HANDLE GRIEF

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 Grief hurts.  It is a knife that cuts and rips and slashes and makes us cry out in terrible pain.  It is an agony of the soul.  When it comes, we feel out of control.

All of us have experienced it for one reason or the other: death, terrible sickness in our own bodies or the bodies of those we love, divorce, the loss of a career.  It comes in different guises, but in some form it always comes to everyone.  It always does.

How best then can we deal with this emotional winter storm?  This ripping and tearing at our stability.  Some weep until there are no more tears left to cry with.  Some try to drown their sorrow in a bottle or the impact of a pill.  Some try to repress their heartache and, like a kettle with no escape valve, eventually explode. 

Would you ease your own grieving time?  Then go out, and though still hurting or remembering how badly once you hurt, use your personal knowledge of pain to help others. 

Remembering will hurt, but it will remind you of what it was like improve your empathy. 

Then willingly search for some other hurting survivor.  Hold the palsied hand of someone old and alone, or give patient love to a little lad or lass who obviously gets very little of it at home.  Be a loving friend who takes a day off from work to stand in those final moments by a grave with someone who knows you went out of your way to show you care. 

In other words, move from the theological to the practical.  Study the Sermon on the Mount and start building your own little hill of concern. 

Helen Keller was deaf, dumb and blind, but she didn’t spend her life sitting alone in  dark, dumb, dingy silence feeling sorry for herself.  Did not burden herself by grieving for a life that might have been.  Rather she got up every morning and went out.  Went out to where the birds were singing, and people were talking and the world was living, all of which she could neither hear nor see.  Went out to pour the sweet perfume of noble thoughts on others and feel some of it splashing back upon herself.

Don’t misunderstand me, she wasn’t born with this wonderful attitude.  In her youth she would literally flail at family and teachers, making loud almost animal-like sounds of frustration. 

She was daily angry and allowed herself to be filled with  hopelessness.  Then one day, her teacher got through to her that there is more than one kind of blindness. 

 

That, yes, there is physical blindness that cannot see light, but there is also spiritual emotional blindness that will not search for light.

 And so she decided to make the most of life and not the least, to look for the best and not the worst.  She decided not to daily grieve over her misfortune, but instead deal with it with a multitude of positive actions minute by minute, hour by hour, day by day until she had lived out a lifetime of service.

More than once I have placed my hand on the shoulder of another human being bent low with hurting and said, “Weep…cry…. Slowly siphon it out of your system.  Then turn and begin to walk away from your wounding.  Otherwise, you but nurture a ghost that will haunt you the rest of your days.” 

In short, when pain and problem come, pray deeply and then deeper still, do all you can and then get on with living.

There is a thin line between those who have conquered life or been conquered by it.  Each additional year of living does not necessarily bring maturity, sainthood and sweetness, or spiritual wisdom.  Strength is not an automatic.

            What then to do?

            Believe God chose your day of birth and knows your day of death.  These are two very important decisions that are His and His alone.  And accepting this knowledge is a good place to start in the battle for stability.

          QUOTES FROM THE SPIRITUAL ABRAHAM LINCOLN BOOK

Everything that happened in the war was not of blood and pain and hate.  The best in man sometimes rises out of the worst.  More than likely the story of what happened

one cold day during the terrible battle of Fredricksburg reached Abe’s ears and pleased the heart of this forgiving President.  It was a dreadful battle that cried out for some miraculous act of empathy.

A Sergeant Richard Kirkland of Company E Carolina Regiment made a request of his commanding officer that was almost denied.  He had looked too long at the tortured, twisted dead and dying men and could finally stand it no more.  He sought startling permission to take water and aid to those dressed in both Blue and Gray. 

“You may get a bullet in the back of your head, son,” he was told.  The soldier replied that he wanted to go anyway.

 “May God protect you,” said Major General J. B. Kershaw.  A short time later, men on both sides of this field of agony and despair, watched in awe as the young man vaulted over a bloodstained stonewall and walked unarmed an d seemingly unafraid among the dead and dying.  They saw him kneel down and cradle a fallen Union soldier in his arms, offer him a drink of water, rest his head on his knapsack and cover him with his own overcoat.  And then move to another soldier nearby.  This time it was a Confederate soldier.

Again and again throughout that long, pale December afternoon, just eleven days before Christmas, Sergeant Kirkland returned with water until every living soldier, from both the North and the South, had felt his compassion and concern.

General Kershaw later wrote that not one shot was fired during that time.  That never had he heard such silent respect.  “…no doubt,” his pen etched, “all the trumpets of heaven resounded on this monumental day.”

Some recent topic titles on his other blog, Whrick’s Writings are:ONE LOG ON A FIRE, TWO JOLLY GREEN GIANTS; LOVE AND FORGIVENESS, WISDOM IS.WHAT IS HAPPY,60 PLUS AND NOT HOLDING

 

CLICK ON THE FOLLOWING URL

 

http://wyrickswritings.blogspot.com

 

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SOME QUOTES FROM Rev. Wyrick’s 9^TH BOOK “THE SPIRITUAL ABRAHAM LINCOLN”

Preface

‘This book is more than just a march down memory lane.  It is certainly not a search-and-destroy mission as are some historical efforts.  It is really a questing for an understanding of the man able to write, “He has the right to criticize who has the heart to

help.”    “Am I not destroying my enemies when I make friends of them?”  “It is the duty of all nations as well as of men to owe their dependence upon the over ruling power of God.”¹   “With malice toward none; with charity toward all…”

Visit Magnus Press to order this book or some of their other unusual and inspiring books.

 

CLICK ON THE URL BELOW

http://www.magnuspress.com/OurProducts2.html 

DO YOU HAVE A SUBJECT YOU WOULD LIKE TO HAVE NEIL WRITE ON; EXAMPLES: COURAGE, LOVE, DETERMINATION, ETC.  JUST GO TO THE BOTTOM AND CLICK ON COMMENT AND SEND US YOUR IDEA.

To view his One Man Dramas on film (see by millions, live and on film and on video)(Martin Luther, Ben Franklin, Charles Wesley, Abraham Lincoln)

CLICK ON THE FOLLOWING

 

http://www.speakerneil.com/